Take Up Your Cross and Follow Me

     “Any cross would be easy to bear if we could only tailor it to fit ourselves. Our Lord’s cross was not made by Him, but for Him. Crosses and burdens are thrust upon us. Our acceptance makes them personal. Our Lord even said that there would be at least seven crosses a week: ‘Take up your cross daily and follow Me.’ Crosses are of two kinds: pure ones, which come from the outside, such as pain, persecution, and ridicule; and inner, or impure crosses, which come as the result of our sins, such as sadness, despair, and unhappiness. These latter crosses can be avoided. They are made by contradicting the will of God. The vertical bar of the cross stands for God’s will; the horizontal bar stand for our wills. When one crosses the other, we have the cross. Our Lord never promised that we would be without a cross; He only promised that we would never be overcome by it. St. Peter so loved the cross, that when the time came for his execution he asked to be crucified upside down. May He who was found guilty of no other crime than that of the excess of love, make us hate the load of sin that made His cross. The whole cross borne in union with His will and following in His footsteps is easier to bear than the splinters against which we rebel.” Archbishop Fulton Sheen (The Fifteen Mysteries)
      True, Christ said in the Gospel of Matthew " 28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”  How often do we struggle to fight against our crosses under our own power?  How often do we feel almost crushed by our burdens? 
      It's not easy to conform our will to God's, yet that is the only way our crosses are made sweet and light to carry.   Twice now I have tried to consecrate myself to the Immaculate Heart of Mary by using 33 Days to Morning Glory.  It seems that as I read through the reflections about our crosses I start to miss days and everything goes by the wayside.  I don't like suffering.  Who does?  I say to myself, "O.K. Lord, I have enough crosses in my life, I really don't need more".  I read how those consecrated to Mary often seem to have more crosses to bare, but that Mother Mary makes those crosses light to carry.  
    It's almost a frightening thought, isn't it?  Human nature will do a number on you if you let it.  Satan, even more so.  I, at least, love comfort.  I don't like conflict, I don't like confrontation, I don't like many things that push me to grow.  Growth hurts, and I don't like to hurt.  As Holy Week rapidly approaches I have been reflecting on what taking up my cross means.  I take up my cross when I get up from the table to get my 4 year old the wet napkin she didn't ask for before I sat down.  I take up my cross when I don't steam up when I have worked to make a hot meal when I was exhausted from the day and my husband comes home and says he's just not hungry and has work to complete instead.  I take up my cross when I wash and fold the laundry for the umteenth time during the week and do it with a joyful heart.  I take up my cross when I sit and read a book to one of my children when really I'd rather be sitting with my eyes closed because I'm tired.  
     When I take up my cross and serve those around me, I am serving Christ himself.  Does that make it easy?  Absolutely not!  I can't tell you the number of times I grumble under my breath, "when do I get to eat a hot meal?.....what you couldn't have asked me for that before I sat down?....isn't that the second outfit you've gotten full of mud and sand today?.....stop it!"  The list could go on, but ya'll know what I'm talking about.  I can't get discouraged though.  Because unlike Jesus, I am only human and not divine.  God know my faults, my root sin that makes me weak and stumble over and over again.  In his mercy he loves me and forgives me.  I entrust myself to his mercy and love, constantly asking for graces along the way.  If I get discouraged and feel stuck there it is because I am trying to fumble through under my own power and not God's.  It is very prideful to do so, and you know what they say pride cometh before.  It's the truth, we all experience falling, often multiple times a day.
     We all go through dark night's of the soul, places where we feel discouraged, abandoned, confused, trapped in a place that, well, just plain sucks.  The solution is to look up, at the image of Christ on the cross.  That is true love.  Doing seemingly small things, but with great love is taking up our cross.  Life isn't easy, but if we look at the bigger picture and give glory to God is the good and in the bad that comes our way we will feel at peace.  Christ is the anchor during the storm, when we fear and ask him to help us, he calms the waters before us.  Christ never promised us there wouldn't be crosses for us to bare, but he did promise he would walk with us through those crosses.  
     I think many of us can't visualize or relate the yolk.  If oxen are placed in an ill fitting yolk they cannot pull their burden well.  It can cut into their shoulders.  If they are placed in yolk well formed to them, they can pull and pull and pull.  They can handle very heavy loads. Christ said his yolk was easy and his burden was light.  This is because he said to his Father, not my will, but thy will be done.  Our Lord knows the needs of our souls better than we do.  Uh yeah, it seems I've gotten pretty deep here.  But, it's good to challenge ourselves to deepen our trust and faith.  

     Sometimes we need to go a little deeper and contemplate the beauty of the cross.  Yes, beauty.  Out of all the blood that was shed and all the mocking, the crowning with thorns, the pain, came everlasting life.   

"Confidence is an absolute requirement if you are to walk with God at the level He desires. In every single circumstance you face, confidence is His legacy to you - that you would grow in trust, faith and joyful dependency." Living The Upgraded Life